Reddia, 36

Your incessant desire to obtain knowledge of all things "Amy" is relentless and a tad over-bearing. However, your persistence shall be rewarded with a lengthy list of fallacies and half-truths. First off, I invented what is commonly referred to as "wit". Anytime you hear a comment that makes you grin or a one-liner that smacks of intelligence and a hint of grit -- you can thank me. I also invented the highly underrated combination of Whiskey and Milk, which I affectionately refer to as "Miskey". Needless to say, this invention has not enjoyed the stellar longevity of "Wit", but, people are ignorant. Long live "Miskey"! I greatly enjoy walks on the beach, staring competitions, turtles, house carpentry, killing insects, tying my shoes, speeding through school zones, reminding the wealthy that they'll die someday, misleading children, confusing the elderly, female asses, cheap booze, disregarding the Ten Commandments, roosters, southern accents, bow tie pasta, living beyond my means, and dandruff shampoo. I'm also hell-bent on making Yahtzee the number one pastime in the USA. Yahtzee! Don't get me started. I've tried many times to be a regular girl. To dim it down a shade and just be an "average Jane". But then I remember that my name is Amy, not Jane. Then I get annoyed that I even had that thought to begin with. Then I say something witty and enjoy a tall glass of "Miskey" and roll 7 Yahtzees in a row. Then I usually mutter something like "Hot Damn" or "Sweet Jesus". It varies. Did I mention I invented Jazz music? Well, I didn't. That's probably why I didn't mention it. But, if I did, I would have included a far greater amount of piccolo solos in the genre. Gotta love the piccolo. In closing, I'd like to point out that you have obtained no useful knowledge of all things "Amy". I bid you adieu